(Hold on tight....there really is a point to this saga...)
Given that today's weather won't let me out of the house, I'll trim close to 2" off this beard today. The increasing length is making my beard difficult to style, and it's getting a bit out of control.
Some folk that aren't in the beard 'inner circles' will think "Taking 2 inches off that beard shouldn't make that much of a difference!", when the reality of the situation is that when this beard is combed straight down, even the most casual observer will note a huge difference. Hold on.... The moral of this Aesop's fable approacheth:
After the snow plows have freed me from my snowy prison, and before I leave my home again, I will style my beard in it's recognizable "up-do" form. With a 100% assurance, I can guarantee you that not even the most eagle-eyed onlooker would notice that a single hair had been trimmed on my face.
The same can be said for my 1 acre in Ladue. My significant-other can leave for work in the morning, and while he is out, I can trim the trees and plants on our property. When trimming and editing is necessary, I can take some CAREFULLY SELECTED 'chunks' out of his most prized Magnolia (as just one example) that is located immediately adjacent to the space that he parks his car.
Just between you and me - and in all confidence, can I just tell you that when he parks his car that evening, and walks into the house, I won't hear a peep about his prized Magnolia being molested.
We have lived in this house 4 years. Every season, I have to prune / trim most 'green stuff' on our property to keep it in-check. To date, and as of this writing, he hasn't noticed a single snip.
Why, you ask, "Hasn't he noticed or said anything about your pruning?"
The answer is quite easy and very natural to me, and I wish I could say the same for those that are hacking the Hell out of the plantings at The Missouri Botanical Gardens.
The answer:
GOOD. JUDICIOUS. EDITING ! ! ! !
Remember:
My beard really NEEDED trimming, and yet people that see me on a daily basis will never know that a single hair has been touched.
I guess we can't say the same for that wonderful stand of Bottlebrush Buckeye (Aesculus parviflora) that is located across from the Climatron.
Please note the wonderfully sheltering feeling that one would get as that passed through these beautiful white spires. Also notice the fantastic symmetry of this space.
Don't jack with me. I know.... I know.... Bottle brush grows quickly. You do know, of course, that there is such a thing as JUDICIOUS EDITING that will accomplish both goals of getting this beautiful plant to grow back, and once again be 'bushy' instead of taller and 'leggy' AND simultaneously maintaining the form and shape that Garden visitors find endearing.
So much for endearing, timelessness and stability, eh?
(The 'grassy' knoll where the 4 faced-Buddha sculpture / lantern stood that has been seasonally planted with tulips..... burgundy elephant ears.... SOMETHING.... is a different story, altogether, and a different book for another day. A couple words to the wise about wasted space and wasted opportunities:
1) Not many people ever died saying, "God, I wish I could see more grass!"
(Please remember - we can get all the grass that our little hearts desire, absolutely free of charge, and in a relatively un-molested state in Tower Grove Park - located right across the street!)
2) I know that most of my readers probably won't see the situation in this light, but I have many very good examples of what sensory deprivation does to unsuspecting victims, and 99.99% of the time, these changes occur slowly, and without the individual's knowledge. (But the changes are immediately noticeable to those that are aware of this danger.)
3) In a all-around point of view, WASTE is a 'bad thing', and should be avoided at all costs.
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'Even as we speak', that is going to become glaringly apparent to the folk at the Missouri Botanical Gardens when I blast them for their latest round of mindless hacking that they have done to iconic and beloved areas of the Gardens.
((:::Almost finished with a blog entry that I am preparing to zing in their direction:::)
As a result of my efforts to maintain detail and to preserve the detail that you might some day enjoy (before it's gone by the way of laziness, watering down, and selling out, etc!), I am well known for being outspoken to these people.
Thusly, I am definitely no stranger to the Vice-President of the Missouri Botanical (Mr. Andrew Wyatt), and I have taken a 'buggy ride' with him in one of their golf carts, doing a one-on-one survey and comparison of 'changes' at the Gardens.
When we finished with our hour and a half 'meeting', I got out of the golf cart, and assumed a shocked look on my face, and quickly looked down at the back of my right calf. My head shot back up as I looked him dead in the eye, and I exclaimed, "Oh, what is that warm, wet sensation that I feel running down the back of my leg?" A confused look shot across his face as I continued, "Oh, now I know what it is! To quote one of my mentors, Judge Judy, 'Don't piss down my leg and tell me it's raining!"
Those people TRULY think I'm crazy, but the only difference between me and them is that I never, ever saw "The Emperor's New Clothes" - and I hop I never will.
(Moral #1 of this Aesop's fable:
If a tree - just as one SMALL example - is still there when you visit MoBot, THANK ME for fighting for it.
Moral #2 of this Aesop's fable:
Git yer buns to The Missouri Botanical Gardens before these sell-out, increasingly lazy, hazy people turn it into nothing more than a glorified walk through an average city park, which, incidentally, we can get free and unmolested right across the street. The threat is very real and at the rate they are going, this outcome is inevitable.
(The small, 10-minute effort that I went through to write this 'book' will not be in vain. I'm using all of it in the blog I'm sending them.
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