Along the same train of thought, Tina Turner - my momma who got her start in St. Louis! - never publicly bad mouthed that worthless Ike Turner because, as she tells the story, if it had not been through the crap that he put her through, she might not have turned into the force that she remains today.
HOWEVER.... (Don't you just LOVE 'howevers'?).....
I would like to think that the price of becoming 'whoever you are today' could be paid at a much lower rate - just a little cheaper, if you know what I mean!
For example, I would like to believe that I would have become the musician and the creative person that I am today even IF my mother was supportive, rather than jab and make fun of any efforts that I ever attempted. She she tried to thwart or squelch anything that I ever attempted. As a counter, "I'll-show-you-who-can-do-what" measure, and absolutely no thanks to her, I became a creative, musically inclined individual. Please keep in mind that her intent was not to make me better, or to drive me forward. Her efforts were simply to stop me from becoming better than her. I am here today to tell you that 'Laziness never pays."
Needless to say, even to this day, she continues to fail miserably at trying to bring me down to her level - and I continue to explore my world, to create beautiful objects and I learn to play new, increasingly complicated music EVERY DAY. She continues a downward spiral, and I continue to soar to new heights, but my victory is by no intentional effort of her own to make me a better person. The results that I have seen in my life are 100% a result of my own hard work and determination, and attention to detail and finesse. Growing up, I knew that there HAD to be a better life than the one that I was dealt, and I was bound and determined to find it. It is a fact that I don't live in a mansion, or I don't have a high paying mob. Nonetheless, my efforts in finding a better life have paid off. I have been successful in my quest.
One would think that I could have achieved the levels that I have without having to go through the shit that she slings my way, but hey, I guess the outcome could have been much worse for me. I COULD BE HER!
Another thing that Tina credits for her life turning around after her "Ike days" is that she converted to Buddhism
.
One of Buddhism's main values is KARMA. That old girl, Karma. She is getting busier by the day, her response times are becoming quicker and her accuracy can't be beat! :)
Here's to Hinduism and Buddhism...... That reminds me... I need to stop by the Hindu Temple here on Weidman Road to say a puja....
Here are some images to browse. The details in this building are amazing, the food served in the basement is wonderful, and I find this temple to be the wonderful, calming and centering respite that my soul craves:
(That building looks small in the pics, but it is actually a fairly large building.)
More images:
http://www.bing.com/images/search?q=hindu+temple+of+st+louis&FORM=BIFD#x0y0
Please find your place of respite and visit it frequently. It should be a special place where no other person can bother you, remove you, or otherwise harass you while you are there.
Another native St. Louisian, Maya Angelo says,
"My Garden is the place that I want to go after my last place is refused, but before I meet God."
I have several such places, including when I am on a Hammond organ or piano bench, when I am walking through the Missouri Botanical Gardens, when I am walking through a national award winning Fine Art Show, or when I am sitting in an Indian restaurant.
Your place(s) of respite will probably be totally different than mine, but they should exist, nonetheless. Go forth and find it, or find them! It will do your mind and body some good!
- Michael
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