Thump, Thump! Who's There?

Oh, the joys of both Erb's Palsy and Gunstock Deformity:

I have woke up in the morning, and found a DEAD arm on my own chest. Thinking, "Who the HELL is in bed with me?", with my left arm, I pick up this strange arm, and then I still can't determine who the arm belongs to. I drop the offending limb, and it lands with a LOUD THUMP! on my chest, knocking the wind out of myself. THEN, I get brave and starting at the fingers, I follow the arm up to the shoulder, before I finally make the determination that it IS ATTACHED TO ME!

After I have a little laugh at how silly I have been, I get out of bed. Er...... I TRY to get out of bed (Ever try to get out of bed with just one arm when you're old??) After several failed attempts, all of which resulted me falling back into the bed and landing face-up on my back, exasperated, with all the energy and determination that I have remaining in my body, I get up as much momentum as possible, and I fling myself from the bed into a standing position.

THEN.....OH, THEN......

the offending right arm - still very dead to the world - absolutely no sensation AT ALL - comes flying back at me. Gunstock Deformity leaves a permanent, very noticeable 'crook' in my right arm that can't be straightened out. This bent arm can give me a very deadly aim that I don't necessarily welcome in my life. My floppy, but crooked arm aims my hand in the right direction: hand punches myself in the crotch. It is at that point that,. while writhing in pain, and trying to catch my breath from that searing pain that I decide that I could remain lying flat on my back on the bed, with BOTH arms by my side until I regain both sensation and what functionality that I have left back in my right arm before I try to get out of bed again!

(Embarrassingly, this has happened to me at least 3 or 4 times in my life, and I think my 'fun' is far from over!)  :D

- Michael